Using your muscles.

I finally learned that being a Mormon is hard work. Sure, sure, choosing not to drink coffee at your job while everyone else is makes you feel different. Not swearing, censoring what media enters your mind, home, lexicon, these all make you feel different. Its so strange that what we find to be good, righteous living was so usual a hundred years ago. And now it is so unusual. We have not changed, the world has changed. Our principles and values remain solidly intact. Back to what I was saying...(I am a rambling machine)...Being different is a choice. First, you choose to be a Mormon. Then, its hard work.
I have been Mormon since birth. I joined when I was 8 of course, but I was born into a strong LDS family, and short of a year or two of teenage stupidity, I went with the Mormon vibe because I knew no differently. Sometimes Id feel like praying, so Id do it. Sometimes I was motivated to go to the temple, so Id do that. Sometimes Id feel as spiritual as a chewed up piece of gum at the bottom of the dumpster and not really know why. I thought trying was enough. Ive thought before how trying is all well and good, but at some point-whatever it is you're attempting-you've got to stop trying and start doing. Trying gets you halfway, doing gets you there. I never prayed to know if the church was true. I believed it from the start-there. Heavenly Father would roll His eyes if I prayed. Oh Melanie, He'd sigh, You already know. You don't need to ask me. Id read stories like this in the Ensign. But what I forgot is that you might know one road is better than that one and still, contrarily, want to take the other one anyway. You might know the church is true, sure. But that's not enough. You have to choose it. Its not part of your being until you braid it into your DNA. Choose it. And everyone, everyone has to choose, at some point. I'd never chosen. At 8, it was the 'thing to do.' When I was a stupid wayward teen, I realized I was unhappy and went back to the only other lifestyle Id known. Oh wait, Joe? Future husband? You're hot! Pray about marrying....yes! That was a yes. Lets do it. Temple wedding...that was easy. Eh, we'll pray together later. It was all so......flowing. I floated in the current. The current being the established avenue of the church. It dug the river and supplied the water and the current, and I just laid back, and floated my buoyant self down it, as easy as you please. This year, I began to sink. I didn't even notice until my head slipped under the water. And over the next few months, I drifted along the bottom. Would I stay there? It seemed too hard to swim back to the surface. The bottom's fine. Except....it wasn't. It was cold. And empty. And very dark. And the surface was there above me, shining brightly. At some point, I wanted back up. When I emerged, things were different. This year was very hard. But I made the choice. I chose to live this life and be a Latter Day Saint. Not just float, but swim. And swim hard. And its a lot of work. Its easy to quit swimming and float, but after a while, your head is barely above the water again. Every day you choose to live this life, and you work at it. You DECIDE to pray every time you get out of bed, and NOT get mad at the idi-fellow driver who cut you off, and to make your home worthy of the spirit (i.e. clean) and pray some more, and study scriptures, and do your callings and call some friends to let you know you love 'em and have Family Home Evening every week and plan an irrevocable trip to the temple once a month and tally and add to your food storage and do service for others and study scriptures every night as a family and gave family prayer every night and do family history and go to church every Sunday and pray together as husband and wife and try to develop talents and add to education and ferry kids to their activities and carve out time for yourself to shower and make a craft and cook three meals a day and...............this list is not close to the end yet. This is WORK. But once you decide that this WORK is WORTH it (and again, everyone has to make that choice at some point) suddenly, you can do it. Suddenly, you want to build those spiritual muscles and get really spiritually fit. Having your life in order is a big part of it. And here is what I hadn't fully committed myself to realizing before this year. That first thing is the only thing that gets the rest of it done. Getting out of bed and praying every single morning. That is the key, right there. That's like, steroids before your workout. Ever since I have CHOSEN this life and have decided to VIEW this life as a lot of worth it work that will garner me untold blessings and get me spiritually BodyBuilder fit, its been easier. Funner. Attainable. So, its work. A lot of work. A lot of good, testimony building, blessing earning, amazing work. I love it. I AM a Latter Day Saint, I have CHOSEN to be one for all eternity.